Relapse

I have fallen off the proverbial wagon.

This saturday, I ate fast food. I wasn't even conscious of it! Well, that's a bit of a misnomer. I simply relapsed, unintentionally. It was almost as if I was on autopilot. Some friends and I were on our way back from the liquor store and decided to swing by Taco Bell on our way home for a quick bite before drinking ourselved unconscious. My first thought was "meh, I'm not all that hungry, I don't think I'll get anything," not "No fast food for me please!" But as soon as we pulled into the drive thru, I said "I want a crunchwrap supreme, no tomatoes" more as a natural reaction than a decision.

I didn't even realize what had happened (I broke my no fast food vow) until YESTERDAY. Instead of beating myself up over it, I've decided to take the much healtheir approach and not give a shit. BUT also look at it as a learning experience. Note to self: Beware! When approaching fast food windows, natural reactions may occur. Now that I'm aware that I have this reaction when approaching a drive up window, it'll be easier for me to make the decision to say no.

So like any recovering addict, I'll give back my newcommers pin, my 50 days sober pin, and start the program anew. Days without fast food: Three.