Nut Up or Shut Up

Just do it.

That's what Sydney, my work best friend/trainer/task master told me about my five miles this week. "Just wake up and do it." I believe that was the phrase that was running through my head as I dragged myself out of bed this morning.

When I was finally ready for my run - Okay, I'm being dramatic, it only took me 40 minutes to get out of bed, hydrated, and dressed - I set out feeling apprehensive. I wasn't sure I was going to be able to push myself for the whole five miles. I didn't want to walk much, and I wanted to keep a good speed. I wanted to maybe even try a pick up.

Just after passing my first mile marker, I got hit with a tight cramp in my lower belly (basically my uterus, gross I know, but I'm a woman, it happens). I freaked out a little, I've had these types of cramps before, and they're never fun. Also, they pretty much make me feel like I'm going to die. I tried walking it out a bit, but it only got worse. So I tried jogging it out, and that didn't help either. Finally, I gave up. I thought "Cramps and jogging don't mix. Cramps, you win."

About a block after I turned around and started to head back, cramps dissapeared completely. It was like I was never in pain at all. I paused for a second, turned back around, and finished what I started.

I made my way as an easy pace to my halfway mark, and that's when it hit me: I had completely lost sight of why I was doing this all in the first place. It's not to be the best, it's not to gloat about my speed. It's to say I did it, and that I finished what I started. I realized that I had put pressure on myself to make every run the perfect run, when really, just doing it makes it the perfect run.

I have never been able to run a full mile (okay, maybe I was able to once in high school, but even then, I don't think so), and now I'm running a full three. Mission freaking accomplished man, everything else is just icing on the cake. Don't whine that it didn't go perfectly, or that you didn't push yourself as hard as you wanted to, or that you're running out of time.

Nut up or shut up, and just finish.

It's the Climb II

Rested yesterday. Thought about running, but after being denied for a freakin Best Buy card (thus crushing my dreams of owing a laptop within the next week), I felt defeated and very much like a loser. The last thing I wanted was a poor mindset to screw up an important run. It's possible I just needed Reese Witherspoon to remind me that exercise releases endorphins, endorphins make you happy, and happy people just don't shoot their husbands!

I decided to run today instead. I wasn't extremely motivated, but I was interested to see how I'd do. I hit the road in my usual fashion and did my best to focus on the music and my rhythm versus how tired my legs felt.

I rounded the corner to face the demon head on. I paused briefly to stretch before starting the climb. I focused on the road a few feet in front of me, so as to not psych myself out.

It totally worked! As soon as my feet felt the road level out, I slowed to a walk. I looked back and did an inner victory dance. It may not have been the exact top (the hill is level for about twenty feet before it declines), but I was probably a good fifteen feet farther from where I stopped last time. AND there was no vomit! I felt a little rumble in my stomach, but it settled as I walked down the other side. When I hit the bottom of the hill I jogged it out till my driveway. It felt pretty good.

What felt even better? My time was 58 minutes. Even with a hill, I was under a 13 minute mile. Oh HELL yeah!

Glass Half Full

I must say, I wasn't super excited to run today. BUT it said I had to on my training schedule, so I did. I set the small goal to run my 3.45 mile loop with pick ups and no walking breaks. I didn't find the gusto to do the pick ups...but I didn't walk. At all! Not even a little bit. My jogging got a little slow here and there, but the motion kept going.

It felt pretty awesome, if I do say so myself.

What felt even more awesome? My time was 41 minutes. That would be an 11min 54 sec mile. Oh yeah.

Countdown to the Half Marathon:
39 days 16 hours 56 minutes.

Weekend Recap

Saturday:

The clouds parted. I had plans to run with a friend at 9 am and I stuck to them. Six miles. Holy shit.

The run itself I think went well. My knees began to hurt on the last mile, but nothing I couldn't power through. We took my friend's dog with us, and I must say, seeing the dog just walk along as we both chugged (my friend adjusting to my slower speed) made me feel a little bad. BUT walking in to work and saying "Why do my feet hurt? Oh, that's because I ran six miles this morning - before coffee. Booyah," made me feel spectacular.

I felt very accomplished, and I'm actually a little excited to try eight miles.

Sunday:
Rested. A lot! I woke up with my back sore, my knees sore, and my feet sore. I was more than greatfull to spend the day slowly wandering around Salem.

Something I've noticed is my appetite has increased. This scares me, mostly because my appetite was pretty big to begin with! I'm trying really hard to only keep healthy things around, so when I crave and eat the caloric damage is minimal. However, when talented co-workers bring in peanut butter cookies with reeses cups melted on top, and I ran six miles in the morning, it's hard to say "No thanks, I'm set," and very easy to say "Hell yeah! Give me half a dozen!"

Today is a run day. The plan is 3 miles with pick ups, no walking breaks. I'll report back.

Lethargic but Successful

I awoke this morning groggy and lethargic. I shuffled to the kitchen for a small glass of water, followed by a large glass of juice. My marathon training guru suggested I lower my fluid intake before I hit the road in order to lower the chance of another heaving episode. I took her advice and plopped down on the couch to watch my future husband Ben Bailey on Cash Cab.

I knew I had already slept in forty five minutes passed what I had planned, but also knew that today was a short run day, and thus would not be out on the road for hours. I took my sweet time getting ready, donning the suit, stretching a wee bit, and determining the ratio of comfort to practicality when it came to choosing a top. (I went with a long sleeve with a t-shirt over, instead of my usual tank top with jacket. The jacket gets a little warm.)

Although all morning I was feeling rather "blah," the jog itself was a pretty good one. I took two very short walking breaks (about a block each), and incorporated five pick ups. AND I didn't feel like I was going to die after ever pick up, just the first one. My muscles however, didn't enjoy it today. It felt as though my quads were resisting. I'm not sure if this is the magical point where instead of just working my muscles I'm actually building on them, or if my legs were just not feeling it today. And my knees hurt randomly. Seriously randomly. I think I may need better shock absorbtion in my shoes.

Oh, and by the way, my time was 42 minutes today. Oh yeah, that's a 12 min 11 second mile.
Holler at your mom!

A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

I woke up this morning, looked outside my window, and thought to myself "Gee, it's lovely, I should run."

My conflict was that I had slept in a little, and had errands to run that would cut in to my running time. *click* Why don't I run to do my errands? Duh.

So today, I suited up, and jogged to City Hall to pay my power bill. It was a very short loop (just under 1.5 miles), but that didn't matter to me. A short run is still a run.

Oh and that friend I had mentioned earlier? Admitted that she's a little bitter, but also thinks it's pretty cool I'm running now. And she seems genuinely interested in how I'm doing. She even invited me to go running with her and her running partner on Sunday! They do about seven miles of hills...I politely declined. People have said that it's not a "friendly" thing to do - admitting that you're upset and not happy with a good decision another friend has made - and I agree. But it's also not friendly to pretend that you're supportive of someone when in fact you may be a little pissed. And I appreciate this friend's honesty. She keeps it real. Thus, I know she's being genuine when she says she thinks it's cool.

It's the Climb

I woke up this morning only partially motivated for a run. Definately a decrease in excitement from yesterday. I'm not sure why, I think because there were some threatening rain clouds hovering.

I got ready routinely and headed out. I had decided yesterday that today I was going to try a new loop of 4.49 miles with a huge ass hill in the middle of it. Every time I drive on this hill, I question whether or not I could conqure it on foot. Today I found out.

My jog began as usual, half mile warm up, light steady pace, I did stop to stretch when I really didn't feel I needed a break, I just wanted to stretch before I hit the hill. I took one more walking break right before the hill in preparation (and fear), and I faced the beast head on. My legs worked HARD to pull my ass up that hill, but I wasn't feeling defeated until about ten feet from the top. A sudden rumble in my tummy turned quickly from a burp to a...burp plus.

Yes, I heaved. Ten feet from where the hill starts to level out. I stood in the shoulder and upchucked all the water and juice I had consumed earlier this morning.

But this did not discourage me! I took a few moments to compose myself, and walked down the other side of the hill. Then jogged it out all the way home. My jog was slow, probably slower that it could have been, but I was moving my feet and that's all that counts.

I plan to defeat that hill next week. All the way to the top, no fear, no heaving. It will be mine, oh yes, it will be mine.

Reaping the Benefits

Yesterday I didn't mean to take off, but it happened. Between a dump trip, lunch with the sis, taking furniture from my mom's, and coffee-dessert with a friend, I ran out of time to run. Yes, yes, I could have pulled myself together at 8:00 after listening to my roommate's epic post-drinking story from her weekend, but...I didn't.

So I worked extra hard today to appease the running gods.

I did three miles, post a half-mile warm up. Waking up this morning, I was excited to hit the road. I chugged my morning glasses of water and juice in order to get out sooner. I donned my running suit, turned on my Zune, and was ready for action. I almost skipped my half-mile warm up just so I could get jogging sooner!

The first mile of a jog went well, my legs were fairly tired, but still moving. I decided to try a "Pick Up" which is where you increase your speed for a short-ish amount of time. Not a sprint, but just picking up the pace. I was fairly confident, giving my excitment to be out running, that I was going to murder this pick up and leave all future pick ups shaking in fear.

I was wrong. Felt like I was going to vomit afterwards. I jogged for a little bit, but had to take a walk to catch my breath. I jogged a couple blocks more, and went in for pick-up number two. This time, I OWNED it. And the entire second half of my jog went like that. After my third pick-up I was fairly out of breath and walked a couple of blocks, but it wasn't as bad as the first one.

I think today may have been the first day that I felt the benefits of running. The accomplishment and pride you feel knowing that you owned it. Even if you only owned it for three blocks, at one point, you owned that run. So way to go body! I'm proud of you!

Accidental Victory.

Friday was my day of rest. It felt good, but the only thing that made me feel accomplished was making my own hummus.

Today was "Long Run" day. Four miles. In my head, I had mapped out a good loop, that I was lead to believe would be roughly 4.66 miles. I wanted to push myself a little today so I did my best to hold a strong, quick (well, quick for me) pace for the first half mile, then chug along like I usually do.

I had a soft goal in mind to not walk at all, but I chickened out. So I changed my goal to jog a full mile at a good pace. First half mile was quick (and I was fairly certain I was either going to blow chunks or cough up a lung). I wasn't sure where the second half mile ended, so I just kept chugging along. I was feeling decent, a little tired in the legs, but my breath had caught back up with me, and decided to just keep going until my legs felt like they were going to fall off. That feeling came about ten feet before the street I had chosen to cut over on, so I pushed on for those last ten feet. My legs felt like jello.

Tried to keep my walking at a good "speed walk" (gotta keep the heart rate up!), so as to not counter-act the jog. As I rounded the second half of my loop, I got to thinking: "This feels like a really long way...But I'm probably just tired." I walked for a total of about seven blocks (split over three breaks) on the way home, mostly to rest my quads, and was feeling slightly guilty about it. I decided to really push the last block and a half (my home stretch block), and found myself busting out as quickly as I did at the beginning.

I was pretty sure I was going to pass out when I got to my front door. And I was fairly certain I had been on the road for FAR longer than expected. I checked the time - one hour and five minutes. Meh, kind of what I expected. I logged on to Mapmyrun.com (where I plot out my awesome running loops down to the .01 of a mile), just to see if my previous 4.66 calculation was correct. WRONG! 5.07!

I accidentally jogged an extra .57 miles. Not much to the skilled runner, but to me, lil ol' me, it's quite a victory. Oh, and that full mile I wanted to jog? Actually was 1.52.

Two victories, one jog. Not too shabby.

Redemption

I awoke this morning in a better mood than I expected. My night's sleep was uninterrupted and deep. I chose to relish in my comfort for an extra twenty minutes before sauntering in to the kitchen for my morning glasses of water and juice.

What felt like seconds later, it was 9:35. Seeing as how I procrastinated my run to the very last second yesterday and consequently spent the rest of the day in an awful mood, I decided to hit the road.

I donned my running suit - much like a crime fighting suit worn by Superheroes (I'm serious! I have tights, boxers, a tank top and a jacket. I look prepared to fight crime!) - turned my Zune waaaaay up, and headed out. The clouds literally parted as I began my half mile warm up. I saw blue in the sky, sun, and not a drop of rain for miles. There was a little wind, however no where near as catastrophic as yesterday.

The run (hm, I keep saying run, as if I'm actually exerting enough effort to constitute a run, but to be honest, it's more of a jog) itself was decent. Two walking breaks, but they were short! About three blocks total...out of 3.45 miles. I did stop to stretch - something I've been meaning to add in as part of the routine, but never got around to it because for some reason I felt like it would slow me down more than help (silly Casey) - but not for long.

I still timed a steady 44 minutes for the 3.45 (which equals out to a 12 min 41 sec mile), and at first was disapointed my time didn't lower. However, aiming to be a silver lining kind of person, I thought about how at least my time didn't raise. I feel as though the running gods granted me redemption today. And I must say, lessoned learned. Don't take an unnecessary rest day.

The Running Gods Don't Take Chastising Lightly

Yesterday was an optional rest or cross train day. I thought about running all day, I really did, but somewhere between a three hour block of Wife Swap, organizing my student loans, and rearranging my corner of the office, I lost track of actually running. I also thought of cross training all day, because I'll be honest, I haven't lifted a finger on the cross training spectrum. So really, I took a rest day, somewhat unjustified. This did NOT make the running gods happy.

Remember when I said that a run the day after a rest day isn't as bad as my mind makes it out to be? Yeah, I lied. WORST. RUN. EVER. TODAY.

First, it was raining. I don't even like walking in the rain, let alone jogging in it. The only thing I like doing in the rain is sitting inside on my couch listening to it in the background as I snuggle up with a fuzzy blanket, hot coffee, and a Meg Ryan movie. I hate the rain. But not only was it raining, it was windy. And I don't mean a light breeze; we're talking wind that knocked my full trash can over and flung my trash down to the end of the block. Wind so strong that my ear buds kept getting ripped out of my ears. I mean gusts of wind so big it didn't even feel like I was moving forward.

During the first mile (post half mile warm up), I had to stop out of pure frustration. I walked WAY more than I usually do, and I couldn't stop the loop in my head that said "This weather fucking sucks, I want to go home, I'm miserable." It SUCKED.
Luckily (and I say luckily because I was certain I was going to give up and walk home), the second half was much better - weather wise. Jogging through the neighborhood there was less of a wind tunnel, and more rain blockage. However, by that point I had apparently already decided to half-ass it all the way home. Sloooooow jog that may have even been slower than my walking. Definitely didn't push myself.

Bottom line, I was not happy with my run today - Both with my performance and the awful weather. All I have to say is...It better not be fucking raining on Race Day.

Finding My Stride

I set out today for my three mile jog uncafinated and unmotivated. I chugged along slowly and somewhat lethargically, and was fairly certain I wasn't going to make this jog without several walking breaks. And right as I felt I wanted to give up and walk pretty much the rest of the way, I listened to my rhythm.

My feet made a steady base bump, my running jacket made a complimentary swoosh-swoosh, and my breathing kind of made a nice overlay of a melody. I listened for a little bit, as my Zune rapidly searched for the next song on my playlist.

Then a huge pollution creating truck rolled by and dirtied my air. I could taste the exhaust fumes. I stopped, spit, and walked.

I did my best to just chug along till I got home (only took one more walking break!). Walked in the house and checked the time. Double take! I was only out for 44 minutes? That means a less than fifteen minute mile!

Total distance: 3.45 miles
Total time: 44 minutes

You do the math :D

Weekend Recap

Saturday:
Long run day. About four steps in to my run I realized the daunting truth about the task I had chosen - Thirteen miles is very very far. And as my mind became cluttered with self doubt and questions, I breezed through the first half mile. It was a fairly good feeling rounding that first corner and suddenly thinking, "Hey, I'm not out of breath, and I don't feel like I'm going to throw up, and my legs don't really hurt, and, and, I've never done that before!" Okay, scratch that, it was an AWESOME feeling. I'm still chugging along with my 15 minute mile, taking walking breaks when my breath gets caught in my chest, but at least I'm out there doing it.

Sunday:
I had been avoiding telling my friends about this half marathon endeavour. Partly because I'm not sure all of them believe I'll follow through, thus providing doubt rather than support. Partly because I've been trying to avoid those that will hold me to this lofty goal, thus making me feel guilty if I do not succeed (through no fault of their own). But mainly because I'm not doing it for them, I'm doing it for me. Therefore I believe my motivation should come from me.

When I told my roommate, who also holds the title of Best Friend so I thought she deserved to be in on it, her "Good Luck" was delivered with a tone of a less than supportive nature. However I must give her credit for telling me that I had to run on Saturday. There was no "or else," I just had to.

Sunday was the day that I told a friend I had been avoiding telling like the plague. And her response was not what I expected, but also undesired: "Wow, you're making me feel really bad about myself right now. I've been training for almost a year, and I'm not doing mine till August. Now you're just going to whip one out in March." Um...thanks for the support? I chose to avoid the topic for the rest of the day.

Today marks the first day of my longer runs. I've been somewhat comfortably hovering at two miles during the week, pushing up to three miles on the weekends. This week, three miles is my standard. Which means...this is becoming a reality.

The Training Rundown

Some of you are probably thinking, "Casey! Training for a half marathon by MARCH? Are you insane?!" And my answer is, Yes. I absolutely am. However, my work best friend Syd has created a fairly intense yet seemingly accomplishable training schedule.
It breaks down to four days of running/jogging, and three days of rest or cross training.

During these first two weeks (I started Dec.27th), I've taken that word "rest" to the heart. Meaning I spend my off days virtually comatose on the couch catching up on the drama at the Jersey Shore. With this, I've noticed two things: 1.) I lose my motivation for the next morning, and thus feel as though I must drag my ass outside to run. And 2.) The run the day after a day off is not as hard as my unmotivated mind tries to make me believe. It's a bit of a battle.

Today was a run day. Two miles with a half mile warm-up walk. I did well, minimal walking breaks, steady pace, until the last quarter mile. Hol-y Sh-it. My legs burned, running muscles I didn't realize were running muscles were screaming at me to quit, and all I could do was think to myself "Home stretch, half marathon baby." It was relatively motivating, but still a battle.

On tomorrow's schedule? Three miles with a half mile warm-up walk. And then only a mere 10 more to go.

The Beginning of the End

Cryptic title, I know.

Okay: New name + New layout + New purpose = Improved Blog. Yes folks, that's right! I'm bringing you an improved, high powered, deadline driven, Super Blog.

Step one: Explain new name.
As my 25th birthday inches closer to me, I've become more aware that I am one quarter through this expedition we call life. And so for the next year, I'm going to document this milestone in the blogosphere.

Step two: Describe new purpose.
My last blog focused on my quest to find Zen. Which if I do say so myself, fizzled out faster than a cheap roadside firecracker three months after the 4th of July. SO, in order to make this blog work, I've refocused to the root of my problem: Being a perpetual project starter. My resolution for the year 2010, is to FINISH projects that I start. I will chose one project a month to focus on until I finish it. These include - but are not limited to - fitness improvement, dietary improvement, art/craft projects, writing adventures, and of course, producing a fantastic blog.

Here, I shall document my triumphs and pitfalls for the whole cyberworld to see. Here is a glimpse of my projects to be:

Jan - Begin training for a half marathon (slight cop-out because the marathon is in March, but I wanted to start small in order to feel like I accomplished something right off the bat)
Feb - Take on Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred
March - Run a half marathon AND Take on Jillian Michaels' "Making the Cut"
April - Write a screenplay

I have a few other projects in mind, but suggestions are always welcome!
That's all for right now my loyal readers, tomorrow I shall update you on my training schedule.